When Stalin died we grieved and were concerned about the future. The victory in the Great Patriotic War was closely tied to the name of Stalin. When I was just a child I realized how well organized the process of evacuation had been. There was clear organization and it was at the time when Stalin ruled the country. I had respect for Stalin, although after the war I began to have questions and doubts.
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Displaying 7741 - 7770 of 50826 results
Simon Gonopolskiy
Ella went to study at the flour milling college after finishing lower secondary school. After finishing college she completed her two-year [mandatory] job assignment [15] in Odessa region. After that she got employment at the bakery in Odessa where she was a production engineer. Later she entered the machine building faculty of Odessa Polytechnic College. We rarely saw each other since we worked different shifts. We got married in 1956. We rented a corner in a room before we could afford to rent a whole room.
Upon graduation I was promoted to the engineer's position at the design office. Later I became head of the design department that designed accessories for machine units. I was awarded two medals at VDNH [All-Union Exhibitions of Achievements of Public Economy] for my accomplishments. I'm very proud of these awards. Later I became deputy chief engineer for export operations and sometimes I traveled abroad.
We lived in Belinskiy Street close to the sea. After work I took my son to the seashore. He learned to swim and dive when he was a small boy. In summer we tried to get out of town. We sometimes rented a room at the seashore in Kryzhanovka near Odessa. I often bought cruises on the Black Sea at the plant. We went to the Crimea and Caucasus; we earned well at that time and could afford it. My family loved the beautiful nature of those regions very much. We read a lot of fiction and Soviet magazines. We had many interesting friends, mainly Jews.
My son Natan finished school in 1977 and entered the Mechanic Faculty of Polytechnic College. Upon graduation he worked at the Research Institute of Machine and Automatic Units. He entered the post-graduate school in the Machine Building Institute in Moscow. When Perestroika [16] began this institute was closed and he worked as the director of laboratory and then as production engineer at the machine tool plant. After the plant was shut down Natan learned computer programming. He works for a private company now.
My wife worked at SKB-3, a special design office. She climbed up the ladder until she reached the position of 1st grade designer. She was a very sensitive woman. She wrote poems. Ella died in a bus accident in 2000 on her way back home from Germany where she was visiting her mother and younger sister. The bus overturned near Lvov. She didn't have outer injuries, therefore doctors paid less attention to her. She died of inner hemorrhages. I cannot forget her: she was a brilliant wife and mother. We buried her in accordance with the Jewish tradition in the Jewish cemetery in Odessa.
Speaking about my Jewish origin and identity it has never occurred to me to forget my identity, but we knew so little. My wife took great efforts to get books about Jewish religion, traditions and history in the 1970s and 1980s. I told my son all I knew. When my son grew older he began to read books about Judaism. He has a very serious attitude towards these issues and often speaks with his son Roman about the Jewish heritage.
I attend the synagogue at Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I take part in activities arranged by Gemilut Hesed. I borrow books from the Jewish library. I'm especially interested in magazines and newspapers from Israel. I hope Israel will have a peaceful future.
ruth strazh
We lived in a local house and this was terrible. Our landlady lived with her two grandchildren, her son's children, who was at the front. The children's mother hanged herself, and the villagers said it was her mother-in-law that was the root cause of it. The landlady had never seen Jews and was sure they were the most horrible beasts in the world. When she learned we were Jews, and that we were in exile, she started poisoning our life as much as she could.
Once her son came home on leave. He came into our room and started asking us where we came from and what was happening in the village, when his mother saw that he was in our room. She broke into the room yelling, 'Get out of here, they are traitors, they are enemies of the people! [23]'. We didn't even know what enemies of the people meant.
Once her son came home on leave. He came into our room and started asking us where we came from and what was happening in the village, when his mother saw that he was in our room. She broke into the room yelling, 'Get out of here, they are traitors, they are enemies of the people! [23]'. We didn't even know what enemies of the people meant.
On 14th June 1941 [see Deportations from the Baltics] [19] early in the morning our landlady dropped by. She said that her maid had been to the store where they told her that the Falstein family, whom we knew well, were arrested by the NKVD early in the morning. Nobody knew why they were arrested, for what allegations. Soon our doorbell rang. There were three individuals at the door: one wearing a marine uniform, another one was a civilian and the third a militiaman. They were armed. They asked for Mama and I said she was at work. They asked me the address, but I didn't know it. Then one of them said my sister and I were to go with them and they would keep looking for Mama. I said we were not going with them when Mama was not there. Then one went to look for Mama, and the two others stayed with us.
They told us to pack our things. I was at a loss. I had a celluloid doll in a woven pram, a birthday gift. When my father was ill and bedridden, he asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I said it was this doll. Mama bought it for me. It seemed to be of the highest value for me, and I grabbed the doll, but I was told to leave it. The militiaman seemed to be a nice guy, and he told me in Estonian that we were to be sent to Siberia and I had to take warm clothes with me. I started throwing warm clothes and underwear from the wardrobe into suitcases.
Our maid lived with us. She considered us as her family and we also treated her as one of us. She asked these people where they were sending her mistress and the children and kneeled before them begging them to leave us alone. The civilian man answered that this was what had to be done, and that this was not to be helped. Then she asked them to allow her go with us.
At that time my Mama came home. Her two brothers also happened to visit us at the moment. Uncle Leib and his wife had recently moved to Tallinn from Valga and were staying with Polina's relatives. Polina's mother and her two younger brothers had already been arrested and taken to the railways station. Leib and Polina were not in the deportation lists and they were staying. Leib had called his brother Peisach immediately, and they hurried to our place. I had a plain watch on my wrist. Uncle Leib took it off my wrist and replaced it with a golden watch, when nobody was looking. We had no money at home. Our uncles gave us 400 rubles, all that they managed to get for us. We boarded the truck, and the militiaman helped our uncles to load our luggage onto the truck. One could tell it was a hard job for him. He was a decent man, and there were other decent people as well.
When we came to the station, we were taken to a freight train. It consisted of cattle freight carriages. We boarded the train. When the guards left the carriage, we saw somebody waiving his hands to us from the carriage next to ours. This was Mama's brother Isroel, we didn't know he'd been arrested, too. Then somebody else waived his hand to us. It was Mama's acquaintance. Mama asked the guard permission to move to this other carriage saying there was her brother there. The guard did not allow this. He said we would meet at the point of destination.
They told us to pack our things. I was at a loss. I had a celluloid doll in a woven pram, a birthday gift. When my father was ill and bedridden, he asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I said it was this doll. Mama bought it for me. It seemed to be of the highest value for me, and I grabbed the doll, but I was told to leave it. The militiaman seemed to be a nice guy, and he told me in Estonian that we were to be sent to Siberia and I had to take warm clothes with me. I started throwing warm clothes and underwear from the wardrobe into suitcases.
Our maid lived with us. She considered us as her family and we also treated her as one of us. She asked these people where they were sending her mistress and the children and kneeled before them begging them to leave us alone. The civilian man answered that this was what had to be done, and that this was not to be helped. Then she asked them to allow her go with us.
At that time my Mama came home. Her two brothers also happened to visit us at the moment. Uncle Leib and his wife had recently moved to Tallinn from Valga and were staying with Polina's relatives. Polina's mother and her two younger brothers had already been arrested and taken to the railways station. Leib and Polina were not in the deportation lists and they were staying. Leib had called his brother Peisach immediately, and they hurried to our place. I had a plain watch on my wrist. Uncle Leib took it off my wrist and replaced it with a golden watch, when nobody was looking. We had no money at home. Our uncles gave us 400 rubles, all that they managed to get for us. We boarded the truck, and the militiaman helped our uncles to load our luggage onto the truck. One could tell it was a hard job for him. He was a decent man, and there were other decent people as well.
When we came to the station, we were taken to a freight train. It consisted of cattle freight carriages. We boarded the train. When the guards left the carriage, we saw somebody waiving his hands to us from the carriage next to ours. This was Mama's brother Isroel, we didn't know he'd been arrested, too. Then somebody else waived his hand to us. It was Mama's acquaintance. Mama asked the guard permission to move to this other carriage saying there was her brother there. The guard did not allow this. He said we would meet at the point of destination.
When in 1939, after the execution of the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact [15], Soviet military bases were established in Estonia, I don't think Estonian people protested against it. It was clear that Hitler was a real threat, and they probably hoped that presence of the Soviet military might protect us from this threat. The situation was peaceful and quiet, and the Soviet military were friendly. Therefore, there was no apprehension, when in August 1940 Estonia was annexed to the Soviet Union and became a Soviet Republic [16].
Thus, our troubles emerged soon. First, our store was nationalized. Mama's brothers also suffered from the new regime. The older brothers lost their timber business, and the younger ones lost their shops. Grandfather Shein died in 1939, and my grandmother moved in with Efrayim. She fell seriously ill in 1940. She was dying, when NKVD [17] officers came to search Efrayim's house. Efrayim's wife Rosa begged them to leave his mother alone, but they were merciless. All of Grandmother's children got together at Efrayim's house to bid farewell to their mother. They were crying, and the NKVD people were turning the house upside down. They didn't even respect death.
Almost immediately after Grandmother died, they forced Efrayim's family out of the house. Shortly afterward we were also forced to move out. Soviet authorities decided to make a military recruitment office in our house. None of these NKVD people cared about where a woman with two daughters was supposed to go. Even before we moved out they came to our home and took away all money and jewelry.
Our landlord was a Polish Jew from Belostok, and his wife was local. They had a son and a daughter. They were very nice people and sympathized with us. Mama hoped that those people would leave us alone having taken away everything from us. We were to learn to live in this new situation. Mama went to work to a scarf shop [18]. Mama took out threads to make fringes on scarves and fixed the edges. She often took work home and I helped her in the evening. Next day she brought the scarves back to work.
Our gymnasium was closed. Instead, they opened a general education Yiddish school. I had no problems with that since Yiddish was my mother tongue. There were arrests, but they were not so numerous. For the most part, they arrested politicians or those who spoke openly against the Soviet regime.
Thus, our troubles emerged soon. First, our store was nationalized. Mama's brothers also suffered from the new regime. The older brothers lost their timber business, and the younger ones lost their shops. Grandfather Shein died in 1939, and my grandmother moved in with Efrayim. She fell seriously ill in 1940. She was dying, when NKVD [17] officers came to search Efrayim's house. Efrayim's wife Rosa begged them to leave his mother alone, but they were merciless. All of Grandmother's children got together at Efrayim's house to bid farewell to their mother. They were crying, and the NKVD people were turning the house upside down. They didn't even respect death.
Almost immediately after Grandmother died, they forced Efrayim's family out of the house. Shortly afterward we were also forced to move out. Soviet authorities decided to make a military recruitment office in our house. None of these NKVD people cared about where a woman with two daughters was supposed to go. Even before we moved out they came to our home and took away all money and jewelry.
Our landlord was a Polish Jew from Belostok, and his wife was local. They had a son and a daughter. They were very nice people and sympathized with us. Mama hoped that those people would leave us alone having taken away everything from us. We were to learn to live in this new situation. Mama went to work to a scarf shop [18]. Mama took out threads to make fringes on scarves and fixed the edges. She often took work home and I helped her in the evening. Next day she brought the scarves back to work.
Our gymnasium was closed. Instead, they opened a general education Yiddish school. I had no problems with that since Yiddish was my mother tongue. There were arrests, but they were not so numerous. For the most part, they arrested politicians or those who spoke openly against the Soviet regime.
When the Soviet Union broke up, I wasn't upset. I think it was good for Estonia. Our current life in independent Estonia proves I was right. Some people still believe life was better in the Soviet Union, but I am not one of them. I'm glad that our country does not have to wait for directions from Moscow, but can build up its own life.
I'm well provided for. Our government believes that those who had been subject to deportation, were victims of repressions, and takes every effort to make our life easier. I have a higher pension than other pensioners. When counting years of work experience they take one year in exile for three, and at my age of 80 I have formally 80 years of work experience. My pension is sufficient to support me. There are other benefits granted to repressed people. I can always feel that my country cares for me, and this is very nice.
The Jewish community [35] was established in Estonia during perestroika [36]. It's grown bigger and stronger. I think, it's a very important course. Many Jews moved to Estonia after the war. They have no relatives and there are many lonely people among them. They visit the community and find things they can do there. It's very important for lonely people. I think all Jews should support each other. It doesn't matter whether they were born here or have moved here from other places.
I attend the community rather frequently. Former students of the Jewish gymnasium have monthly meetings at the community. It's a pity there are few of us left. Some perished during the Holocaust, and others died after the war. I was a member of the Women's Zionist organization WIZO in our community. WIZO takes care of elderly and lonely people. I can't continue this work now. I visit the community on Jewish holidays. I like spending time with the people I know and like.
I'm well provided for. Our government believes that those who had been subject to deportation, were victims of repressions, and takes every effort to make our life easier. I have a higher pension than other pensioners. When counting years of work experience they take one year in exile for three, and at my age of 80 I have formally 80 years of work experience. My pension is sufficient to support me. There are other benefits granted to repressed people. I can always feel that my country cares for me, and this is very nice.
The Jewish community [35] was established in Estonia during perestroika [36]. It's grown bigger and stronger. I think, it's a very important course. Many Jews moved to Estonia after the war. They have no relatives and there are many lonely people among them. They visit the community and find things they can do there. It's very important for lonely people. I think all Jews should support each other. It doesn't matter whether they were born here or have moved here from other places.
I attend the community rather frequently. Former students of the Jewish gymnasium have monthly meetings at the community. It's a pity there are few of us left. Some perished during the Holocaust, and others died after the war. I was a member of the Women's Zionist organization WIZO in our community. WIZO takes care of elderly and lonely people. I can't continue this work now. I visit the community on Jewish holidays. I like spending time with the people I know and like.
My husband and I visited Valga several times after we returned to Tallinn. It was so dear! Every year I visited Valga on the death anniversary of my grandmother and grandfather. I went to their graves. I also visited the town on holidays. We also observed Jewish traditions at home during the Soviet period. What was happening at our home was nobody's business. We were the ones to choose between Jewish and Soviet holidays that we wanted to celebrate. We did not want to celebrate the evil and the losses that the Soviet era brought us.
We only went to the synagogue on holidays. After we returned, we had no opportunity to follow kashrut. There was no place to buy kosher products. However, we did our best. We were sure to have matzah on holidays. We could buy it at the synagogue, and when it was not available there, we made it at home. We fasted on Yom Kippur and conducted the Kapores ritual. We utilized money instead of chickens, and then sent the money to the synagogue.
Our son did not get any Jewish education, but he knew all Jewish traditions and watched us observing them at home. Before he was to turn 13, he was prepared for the bar mitzvah. Maxim did not know Hebrew, and I wrote him the prayers in Russian letters, and he learned them by heart. There was a lawyer in Tallinn. His name was Levitin. Later he moved to Israel. His father was a great scholar in Jewish rituals and traditions. He trained Maxim for the bar mitzvah. We bought Maxim a new suit, shirt and tie for the bar mitzvah. My mother-in-law gave him a watch when we returned from the synagogue. Maxim was doing well at school, but he never joined the pioneers [33], or the Komsomol [34] at school. It was his decision, and his teachers failed to convince him otherwise. My son was always good at standing his own ground.
Anti-Semitism developed in Estonia during the Soviet regime. I never faced it myself. I was always treated in a fair manner. A lot depends on the personality, but I couldn't help seeing that the attitude to Jews was different from what it was like in pre-Soviet Estonia. Soviet authorities were against anti-Semitism by word, but in reality, they were spreading it.
We only went to the synagogue on holidays. After we returned, we had no opportunity to follow kashrut. There was no place to buy kosher products. However, we did our best. We were sure to have matzah on holidays. We could buy it at the synagogue, and when it was not available there, we made it at home. We fasted on Yom Kippur and conducted the Kapores ritual. We utilized money instead of chickens, and then sent the money to the synagogue.
Our son did not get any Jewish education, but he knew all Jewish traditions and watched us observing them at home. Before he was to turn 13, he was prepared for the bar mitzvah. Maxim did not know Hebrew, and I wrote him the prayers in Russian letters, and he learned them by heart. There was a lawyer in Tallinn. His name was Levitin. Later he moved to Israel. His father was a great scholar in Jewish rituals and traditions. He trained Maxim for the bar mitzvah. We bought Maxim a new suit, shirt and tie for the bar mitzvah. My mother-in-law gave him a watch when we returned from the synagogue. Maxim was doing well at school, but he never joined the pioneers [33], or the Komsomol [34] at school. It was his decision, and his teachers failed to convince him otherwise. My son was always good at standing his own ground.
Anti-Semitism developed in Estonia during the Soviet regime. I never faced it myself. I was always treated in a fair manner. A lot depends on the personality, but I couldn't help seeing that the attitude to Jews was different from what it was like in pre-Soviet Estonia. Soviet authorities were against anti-Semitism by word, but in reality, they were spreading it.
My husband and I visited Valga several times after we returned to Tallinn. It was so dear! Every year I visited Valga on the death anniversary of my grandmother and grandfather. I went to their graves. I also visited the town on holidays. We also observed Jewish traditions at home during the Soviet period. What was happening at our home was nobody's business. We were the ones to choose between Jewish and Soviet holidays that we wanted to celebrate. We did not want to celebrate the evil and the losses that the Soviet era brought us.
We only went to the synagogue on holidays. After we returned, we had no opportunity to follow kashrut. There was no place to buy kosher products. However, we did our best. We were sure to have matzah on holidays. We could buy it at the synagogue, and when it was not available there, we made it at home. We fasted on Yom Kippur and conducted the Kapores ritual. We utilized money instead of chickens, and then sent the money to the synagogue.
Our son did not get any Jewish education, but he knew all Jewish traditions and watched us observing them at home. Before he was to turn 13, he was prepared for the bar mitzvah. Maxim did not know Hebrew, and I wrote him the prayers in Russian letters, and he learned them by heart. There was a lawyer in Tallinn. His name was Levitin. Later he moved to Israel. His father was a great scholar in Jewish rituals and traditions. He trained Maxim for the bar mitzvah. We bought Maxim a new suit, shirt and tie for the bar mitzvah. My mother-in-law gave him a watch when we returned from the synagogue. Maxim was doing well at school, but he never joined the pioneers [33], or the Komsomol [34] at school. It was his decision, and his teachers failed to convince him otherwise. My son was always good at standing his own ground.
We only went to the synagogue on holidays. After we returned, we had no opportunity to follow kashrut. There was no place to buy kosher products. However, we did our best. We were sure to have matzah on holidays. We could buy it at the synagogue, and when it was not available there, we made it at home. We fasted on Yom Kippur and conducted the Kapores ritual. We utilized money instead of chickens, and then sent the money to the synagogue.
Our son did not get any Jewish education, but he knew all Jewish traditions and watched us observing them at home. Before he was to turn 13, he was prepared for the bar mitzvah. Maxim did not know Hebrew, and I wrote him the prayers in Russian letters, and he learned them by heart. There was a lawyer in Tallinn. His name was Levitin. Later he moved to Israel. His father was a great scholar in Jewish rituals and traditions. He trained Maxim for the bar mitzvah. We bought Maxim a new suit, shirt and tie for the bar mitzvah. My mother-in-law gave him a watch when we returned from the synagogue. Maxim was doing well at school, but he never joined the pioneers [33], or the Komsomol [34] at school. It was his decision, and his teachers failed to convince him otherwise. My son was always good at standing his own ground.
I was released from exile in 1956. The fact that my husband was a veteran of the war expedited the matter. My mama and sister weren't released until 1960. My sister was deported at the age of twelve. She worked in the field and then worked at a plywood factory, before she entered a vocational school where she was given training in consumer services. She became a manicurist. After finishing her school Sofia worked at a local hairdresser's. When she returned to Tallinn, she went to work as a manicurist. Sofia married Vladimir Popov, a Russian man. They lived a good life together. The only sad thing was that they had no children.
After the war we had no relatives left in Tallinn. Mama had only her brother Herz left. He was released from the Gulag in 1947, and he moved to Estonia. In 1948 his daughter Irene returned from exile. When in 1948 they were again arresting those that had been in exile, Herz and his daughter moved to Tashkent. His wife was still in exile. She was only released, when rehabilitation [30] of the victims of persecution [Great Terror] [31] began. She also moved to Tashkent to reunite with her family. Herz died in Tashkent in 1985. His wife died in 1999. Irene returned to Tallinn from Tashkent in 2000, when Estonia was independent [32].
Two of my mother's brothers perished in the Gulag. We only know that Efrayim died on 14th June 1942. In his death certificate the cause of death is stated as dystrophy, but we know nothing about the circumstances of his death: whether he starved to death, or it was a disease, whether he died in an accident or was killed. We have no information about Isroel. He just disappeared in the Gulag. Leib, Abram and Peisach were killed in Estonia by fascists and so were their sons. Mama's sister Ella, who lived in Riga with her family, also perished during the occupation of Latvia. So, that's our account: Hitler killed four of the Shein family, and Stalin killed two members of the family. My father's sister Dora died in Moscow in 1947.
After the war we had no relatives left in Tallinn. Mama had only her brother Herz left. He was released from the Gulag in 1947, and he moved to Estonia. In 1948 his daughter Irene returned from exile. When in 1948 they were again arresting those that had been in exile, Herz and his daughter moved to Tashkent. His wife was still in exile. She was only released, when rehabilitation [30] of the victims of persecution [Great Terror] [31] began. She also moved to Tashkent to reunite with her family. Herz died in Tashkent in 1985. His wife died in 1999. Irene returned to Tallinn from Tashkent in 2000, when Estonia was independent [32].
Two of my mother's brothers perished in the Gulag. We only know that Efrayim died on 14th June 1942. In his death certificate the cause of death is stated as dystrophy, but we know nothing about the circumstances of his death: whether he starved to death, or it was a disease, whether he died in an accident or was killed. We have no information about Isroel. He just disappeared in the Gulag. Leib, Abram and Peisach were killed in Estonia by fascists and so were their sons. Mama's sister Ella, who lived in Riga with her family, also perished during the occupation of Latvia. So, that's our account: Hitler killed four of the Shein family, and Stalin killed two members of the family. My father's sister Dora died in Moscow in 1947.
Actually, Jewish people observed Jewish traditions in Tallinn after the war. However, it was not safe for public officials or party members [see Struggle against religion] [28]. My nephew, Yakov and Yevgenia's son, had been born two months before Maxim. He also had his brit milah. Yakov's cousin's brother was a member of the Party and worked in the Prosecutor's office in Tallinn. He went to another town on business at this period, so that in case somebody found out, he could say that everything was done without his knowledge. When our son was three weeks old, I was arrested - on 16th December 1948. I was allowed to take my son to jail with me. I refused to have him with me. I knew he might die in jail. I was taken to the jail in Tallinn, and my son stayed with my mother-in-law and my husband.
I had tried to obtain a legal status before my son was born. My former schoolmate Tarel was Chairman of the Council of Ministers of Estonia, I think. I went to see him. I told him my story. He gave me a note and told me to take it to the KGB [29] and tell them I came from him. My mother-in-law told my husband I should not go to this office alone. When we came to the building, Yakov was not allowed inside. I went along long dark corridors. The employee I came to see told me that he advised me to leave Tallinn immediately, so that when there was a request for my whereabouts received, I was not there. In case of issuance of an official request I was to be sent back to Kirov with a convoy.
Mama wrote me that the commandant's office in Slobodskoye already registered my absence. The commandant told my mother that if I returned on my own will, he was not going to apply any sanctions against me, but if I were to be convoyed back, I would be in trouble. I showed Mama's letter to my family. They told me that nobody was going to do any harm to a pregnant woman, and then, when I had a baby, they would not dare to disturb me. I told the KGB I was pregnant and they wanted me to submit a doctor's statement that I needed continuous medical observation. I brought them this statement, and then the KGB officer told me to come back after I had the baby to register my presence. When my son and I were released from the hospital, my family told me to forget about going to the KGB since they must have long forgotten about me. As it turned out, the KGB never forgot anything or anybody.
I spent half a year in jail in Tallinn. I was allowed to see my family. Yakov and Zalman came to see me. They brought my son's pictures with them. The prison cells were overpopulated. There were different people there. There were mothers, fiancées, wives and sisters of Estonian patriots, accountants and directors of various enterprises, religious people, persecuted for their faith, and criminals. All were in prison.
On 16th June 1949 I was taken to the office of the warden and he told me he had received my verdict from Moscow. I was sentenced to three years in a camp. He told me to familiarize myself with the verdict and sign it. Shortly afterward I was moved from a common to a holding cell. I stayed there for some time before some Russian women, thieves, and I were taken to a photographer's office. These thieves knew everything that was happening in jail. They communicated with other prisoners using the Morse code. They told me I had nothing to worry about. I didn't know there was a law on amnesty for women having children under seven years of age. All those with me were released, but I was deported to Kirov region.
I was released from camp imprisonment, but I was still to spend three years in deportation. I was kept in Kirov deport prison for a few weeks. There were other Estonian prisoners that had left from exile without an official permission, and there were also criminals, and even murderers in this jail. In the train to Kirov there was a whole carriage with murderers that were going to a jail in Kirov. I was taken to Slobodskoye. There were other women going with me. One had a four-months old baby.
I had tried to obtain a legal status before my son was born. My former schoolmate Tarel was Chairman of the Council of Ministers of Estonia, I think. I went to see him. I told him my story. He gave me a note and told me to take it to the KGB [29] and tell them I came from him. My mother-in-law told my husband I should not go to this office alone. When we came to the building, Yakov was not allowed inside. I went along long dark corridors. The employee I came to see told me that he advised me to leave Tallinn immediately, so that when there was a request for my whereabouts received, I was not there. In case of issuance of an official request I was to be sent back to Kirov with a convoy.
Mama wrote me that the commandant's office in Slobodskoye already registered my absence. The commandant told my mother that if I returned on my own will, he was not going to apply any sanctions against me, but if I were to be convoyed back, I would be in trouble. I showed Mama's letter to my family. They told me that nobody was going to do any harm to a pregnant woman, and then, when I had a baby, they would not dare to disturb me. I told the KGB I was pregnant and they wanted me to submit a doctor's statement that I needed continuous medical observation. I brought them this statement, and then the KGB officer told me to come back after I had the baby to register my presence. When my son and I were released from the hospital, my family told me to forget about going to the KGB since they must have long forgotten about me. As it turned out, the KGB never forgot anything or anybody.
I spent half a year in jail in Tallinn. I was allowed to see my family. Yakov and Zalman came to see me. They brought my son's pictures with them. The prison cells were overpopulated. There were different people there. There were mothers, fiancées, wives and sisters of Estonian patriots, accountants and directors of various enterprises, religious people, persecuted for their faith, and criminals. All were in prison.
On 16th June 1949 I was taken to the office of the warden and he told me he had received my verdict from Moscow. I was sentenced to three years in a camp. He told me to familiarize myself with the verdict and sign it. Shortly afterward I was moved from a common to a holding cell. I stayed there for some time before some Russian women, thieves, and I were taken to a photographer's office. These thieves knew everything that was happening in jail. They communicated with other prisoners using the Morse code. They told me I had nothing to worry about. I didn't know there was a law on amnesty for women having children under seven years of age. All those with me were released, but I was deported to Kirov region.
I was released from camp imprisonment, but I was still to spend three years in deportation. I was kept in Kirov deport prison for a few weeks. There were other Estonian prisoners that had left from exile without an official permission, and there were also criminals, and even murderers in this jail. In the train to Kirov there was a whole carriage with murderers that were going to a jail in Kirov. I was taken to Slobodskoye. There were other women going with me. One had a four-months old baby.
I managed to somehow find my school friend and future husband Yakov Strazh. We parted in 1941, when our family was deported, and since then I had no information about him. Yakov's father died in 1938, one year after my father had died. Yakov and his younger brother worked in their father's hat shop. In 1940 the Soviet regime nationalized the shop. It became a state run shop. Yakov's family escaped deportation. When the German forces were close to Estonia, they managed to evacuate.
We parted, when I was 16, and Yakov was 18. When we were in the Gulag, I received a letter from Yakov. He sent me his field postbox number. I hesitated for some time before sending Yakov a letter. He replied and wrote that he agreed to evacuate to Siberia hoping to be close to where I was. Yakov was regimented in 1942, when he was in evacuation. He served in the Estonian Corps [26]. He wrote me from the front line that had been under terrible firing several times, but he survived, because it was God's will that we reunited after the war.
Later I received a letter from a friend of mine, when Tallinn was liberated. She wrote me that Yakov was eager to run to see me, but he did not dare. So many years had passed, and he was afraid I did not need him any longer. I thought: Do I want him to arrive and see me living in a barrack with 300 other tenants? I wrote Yakov that I was eager to see him, but that at the moment I didn't want him to arrive, maybe later, when we left the zone. When we moved to Slobodskoye, Yakov was still in the army, but he could take a leave since the war was already over. As soon as I gave him my new address, he arrived.
Yakov insisted that we got married immediately. Our wedding was as plain as our circumstances. Mama could not leave her work, my sister studied at a vocational school, so, we went to the registry office. The registry officer went to the executive committee [27] financial department on the second floor and returned with two employees of the finance department. They witnessed our wedding. There was a market across the street from the registry office where a vendor was selling draft vodka. We went there and Yakov had 100 g and I had 50 g vodka shots. We also bought a bottle of vodka to take it home. In the evening we drank this vodka. Yakov had some food with him that we hadn't seen for many years: herring, sausage and meat. Our landlady was our only guest at the wedding. This is what our wedding was like.
We parted, when I was 16, and Yakov was 18. When we were in the Gulag, I received a letter from Yakov. He sent me his field postbox number. I hesitated for some time before sending Yakov a letter. He replied and wrote that he agreed to evacuate to Siberia hoping to be close to where I was. Yakov was regimented in 1942, when he was in evacuation. He served in the Estonian Corps [26]. He wrote me from the front line that had been under terrible firing several times, but he survived, because it was God's will that we reunited after the war.
Later I received a letter from a friend of mine, when Tallinn was liberated. She wrote me that Yakov was eager to run to see me, but he did not dare. So many years had passed, and he was afraid I did not need him any longer. I thought: Do I want him to arrive and see me living in a barrack with 300 other tenants? I wrote Yakov that I was eager to see him, but that at the moment I didn't want him to arrive, maybe later, when we left the zone. When we moved to Slobodskoye, Yakov was still in the army, but he could take a leave since the war was already over. As soon as I gave him my new address, he arrived.
Yakov insisted that we got married immediately. Our wedding was as plain as our circumstances. Mama could not leave her work, my sister studied at a vocational school, so, we went to the registry office. The registry officer went to the executive committee [27] financial department on the second floor and returned with two employees of the finance department. They witnessed our wedding. There was a market across the street from the registry office where a vendor was selling draft vodka. We went there and Yakov had 100 g and I had 50 g vodka shots. We also bought a bottle of vodka to take it home. In the evening we drank this vodka. Yakov had some food with him that we hadn't seen for many years: herring, sausage and meat. Our landlady was our only guest at the wedding. This is what our wedding was like.
Mama followed thee kosher rules. We had an Estonian maid. She had served in a Jewish family before and knew the rules. Mama did the cooking herself observing the kosher requirements. We had two tables in the kitchen: one for meat and one for dairy products. We also had two cupboards for meat and dairy products. My sister and I did not need to be reminded about using different spoons for meat or dairy products. Also, the dishes, tableware and utensils for Pesach were kept separately. I often watched Mama cooking meat and knew how to make it kosher. Mama left meat sprinkled with salt in a bowl to have the blood drained from the meat for two or so hours, and then it was left in water, and the water had to be replaced a few times, before it was ready for cooking.
I met Mara Shaz, whose family moved to Tallinn from Riga. He house was the one next to our neighbors'. I knew that theirs was a non-kosher cuisine. I often visited them, and her mother often invited me to meals. I just loved sausages, and they often had sausages, but I knew that they were non-kosher and had blood in them, and I couldn't eat them. I couldn't even imagine swallowing one little bite. This is just a matter of habit, the way one is raised.
Mama used to say that we were to watch closely that there was no non- kosher food at home. What if Grandmother and Grandfather dropped by and we had nothing to offer them. I often watched Mama cooking for Sabbath. Mama always baked challah for Sabbath, though she could have just bought it from a Jewish bakery. I used to make little challot for my dolls from the dough Mama gave me. Mama baked them for me, and I liked eating them, crispy and very delicious. I know how to make challah from four pieces.
On Sabbath we always had minced herring, liver paste, gefilte fish and chicken broth. Mama cooked food for two days, and on Saturday the maid heated and served it. On Friday evening Mama lit candles and prayed over them. We celebrated all Jewish holidays following the rules. We had matzah at Pesach, and my father conducted seder.
I wouldn't say that my parents often went to the synagogue, but the whole family went there on Jewish holidays. On Yom Kippur my parents spent a day at the synagogue and fasted. My sister and I had meals on Yom Kippur before we went to school, but when I studied in the gymnasium I fasted like my parents.
On Jewish holidays we visited Mama's parents in Valga. I was off from the gymnasium on Jewish holidays. My mother's brothers and sisters living in Valga, and their families, got together at my mother's parents'. I remember Grandfather swept bread crumbs onto a wooden shovel before Pesach. My father didn't do it at home.
I met Mara Shaz, whose family moved to Tallinn from Riga. He house was the one next to our neighbors'. I knew that theirs was a non-kosher cuisine. I often visited them, and her mother often invited me to meals. I just loved sausages, and they often had sausages, but I knew that they were non-kosher and had blood in them, and I couldn't eat them. I couldn't even imagine swallowing one little bite. This is just a matter of habit, the way one is raised.
Mama used to say that we were to watch closely that there was no non- kosher food at home. What if Grandmother and Grandfather dropped by and we had nothing to offer them. I often watched Mama cooking for Sabbath. Mama always baked challah for Sabbath, though she could have just bought it from a Jewish bakery. I used to make little challot for my dolls from the dough Mama gave me. Mama baked them for me, and I liked eating them, crispy and very delicious. I know how to make challah from four pieces.
On Sabbath we always had minced herring, liver paste, gefilte fish and chicken broth. Mama cooked food for two days, and on Saturday the maid heated and served it. On Friday evening Mama lit candles and prayed over them. We celebrated all Jewish holidays following the rules. We had matzah at Pesach, and my father conducted seder.
I wouldn't say that my parents often went to the synagogue, but the whole family went there on Jewish holidays. On Yom Kippur my parents spent a day at the synagogue and fasted. My sister and I had meals on Yom Kippur before we went to school, but when I studied in the gymnasium I fasted like my parents.
On Jewish holidays we visited Mama's parents in Valga. I was off from the gymnasium on Jewish holidays. My mother's brothers and sisters living in Valga, and their families, got together at my mother's parents'. I remember Grandfather swept bread crumbs onto a wooden shovel before Pesach. My father didn't do it at home.
My grandmother and grandfather were very religious. There was a synagogue in Valga, and my grandfather set up a prayer house at his home. They followed kashrut and Jewish traditions at home. All members of the family went to the synagogue on Sabbath and Jewish holidays and celebrated holidays at home. They spoke Yiddish at home. All of them also spoke fluent German and Estonian.
My parents had a traditional Jewish wedding. Both families were religious, and all of my mother's and father's brothers and sisters had Jewish weddings. My mother and father stayed in Berlin for six months while my father had practice in a clinic there before they moved back to Valga. They rented an apartment. It was a big apartment, and my father also established his office where he received patients. I remember that my father never allowed my sister or me to enter his office. He was a very tidy person, and he suffered even when a pencil on his desk happened to be in the place. Nobody, but Mama, was allowed to clean his office.
My parents had a traditional Jewish wedding. Both families were religious, and all of my mother's and father's brothers and sisters had Jewish weddings. My mother and father stayed in Berlin for six months while my father had practice in a clinic there before they moved back to Valga. They rented an apartment. It was a big apartment, and my father also established his office where he received patients. I remember that my father never allowed my sister or me to enter his office. He was a very tidy person, and he suffered even when a pencil on his desk happened to be in the place. Nobody, but Mama, was allowed to clean his office.
In 1917 a revolution [5] took place in Russia. During the revolution my grandmother and her older daughter Dora moved to Rostov-on-the-Don in Russia. I don't know why they decided to move there. All I can think is that they wanted to move where nobody knew them and where they could feel safer, considering that my grandfather was a rabbi. My grandmother and my aunt may have been afraid that Bolsheviks [6] might question this part, while when they moved they might have changed their family name.
My father's family was very religious. In Tallinn my grandfather was a rabbi in the synagogue [4] of Tallinn. My grandfather's photograph was there in the Tallinn synagogue office until the early 1940s. My father had a similar, but enlarged, picture over his desk. The family did observe Jewish traditions, followed kashrut and celebrated Sabbath and Jewish holidays. It couldn't have been otherwise in a rabbi's family. My father and his brother received Jewish education, as was common with Jewish families. I don't know what language they spoke in my father parents' family. When I first saw my grandmother Johanna in 1937, the only language she spoke was German, and my father could speak fluent Yiddish.
All three children were given appropriate secular education. They finished a gymnasium and continued their studies. My father's older sister Dora graduated from Tartu University with the diploma of a dentist. My father and his younger brother Leon went to Vienna and entered the Medical Faculty of Vienna University.
All three children were given appropriate secular education. They finished a gymnasium and continued their studies. My father's older sister Dora graduated from Tartu University with the diploma of a dentist. My father and his younger brother Leon went to Vienna and entered the Medical Faculty of Vienna University.
When my father was to go to Moscow to pick his mother I wrote her a long letter sending it with him. I wrote to her that we had a five-room apartment and Mama has prepared a cozy room for her to live in. When Grandmother arrived, she had all new clothes bought for her. My grandmother couldn't believe it that she had a room of her own and there were no other tenants in the apartment. In Moscow it would have been five families living in a five-room apartment. We took care of Grandmother, but unfortunately, she didn't last long. My grandmother died of a heart attack in 1936. My grandmother was buried in the Jewish cemetery in Tallinn according to the Jewish traditions.
In 1937 my father died. Flu affected his kidneys. He had a long course of treatment, but medicine had limited capabilities then. My father died of heart thrombosis. He was buried in the Jewish cemetery near my grandmother's grave in Tallinn according to Jewish traditions. Mama became a widow at 37. She was to raise two children. Mama's brothers provided us support and assistance. They formed a close family: one for all and all for one. My father's fabric store supported us all right. Mama could not have possibly managed the store had it not been for her brothers' advice and assistance.
In 1937 my father died. Flu affected his kidneys. He had a long course of treatment, but medicine had limited capabilities then. My father died of heart thrombosis. He was buried in the Jewish cemetery near my grandmother's grave in Tallinn according to Jewish traditions. Mama became a widow at 37. She was to raise two children. Mama's brothers provided us support and assistance. They formed a close family: one for all and all for one. My father's fabric store supported us all right. Mama could not have possibly managed the store had it not been for her brothers' advice and assistance.
, Russia
When I was 12 or 13, a course of popular dances opened in the gymnasium. I joined it, and my father had nothing against it. All of my classmates attended the course. We enjoyed dancing so much! Once after a dancing class a friend of mine told me she'd seen an announcement of a dance party in Betar and she suggested we went there together. I didn't say anything about it at home, and we went to the party. I was late for dinner. We ha a strict rule that the family got together for dinner. We had breakfast at our own time; my sister and I were the first ones to have breakfast before we went to the gymnasium. My father started work later. We also had lunch at different hours, and only dinner was for all of us. I was 10 or 15 minutes late. My father asked me where I had been and I told him the truth. It goes without saying that I was punished. My father was not so mad about my being late as about my going to a Zionist organization when he had forbidden me to do so.
We knew very little about life in the Soviet Union. Since Papa's sister, brother and Grandmother moved to the Soviet Union we did not have continuous contact with them. Correspondence was no problem with us, but those living in the USSR had to be cautious about corresponding with their relatives abroad [13]. My parents must have known about it, and they sent letters on occasion. My father was very unhappy about his relatives living from hand to mouth while we were doing so well.
In 1933 my father decided to visit his relatives. Obtaining visas from the Soviet Embassy was a difficult thing to do, but my father managed somehow. He was horrified when he returned. We had no idea what a shared apartment [14] was about, and my father was shocked when he saw that Dora, Leon and their families and Grandmother lived in a stuffed shared apartment with a few other tenants in it. He told us that buying plain food products was a problem in the Soviet Union, and what awful clothes people wore, and how much effort one had to spend to get the most necessary things.
We knew very little about life in the Soviet Union. Since Papa's sister, brother and Grandmother moved to the Soviet Union we did not have continuous contact with them. Correspondence was no problem with us, but those living in the USSR had to be cautious about corresponding with their relatives abroad [13]. My parents must have known about it, and they sent letters on occasion. My father was very unhappy about his relatives living from hand to mouth while we were doing so well.
In 1933 my father decided to visit his relatives. Obtaining visas from the Soviet Embassy was a difficult thing to do, but my father managed somehow. He was horrified when he returned. We had no idea what a shared apartment [14] was about, and my father was shocked when he saw that Dora, Leon and their families and Grandmother lived in a stuffed shared apartment with a few other tenants in it. He told us that buying plain food products was a problem in the Soviet Union, and what awful clothes people wore, and how much effort one had to spend to get the most necessary things.
There was no anti-Semitism in Estonia before the war. Even when Hitler came to power in 1933 [9], the attitude to Jews did not change in Estonia. I never felt myself different from others. Jews were never abused for their Jewish identity. Life was very quiet, and even at night the streets were safe. Schoolchildren of the Jewish gymnasium wore uniforms that were easily identifiable, but Estonian or German children never teased us.
There were a few children's and young people's Jewish organizations, both leftist and rightist ones. My friends joined some and I also wanted to join one. When I mentioned this at home in my father's presence, he said I had to study instead of going into politics. So I never joined Betar [10], or Hashomer Hatzair [11]. My father had nothing against my attending children's centers, etc., as long as they had nothing to do with leftist or rightist Zionist organizations. This was strictly forbidden.
I attended a Maccabi [12] gym going in for gymnastics. I also had two Russian and two English classes per week besides school. I also took music classes twice a week and also, practiced playing at home. I was learning to play the piano. My parents bought a piano. Mama played the piano well, and listened to my playing, when I practiced at home.
There were a few children's and young people's Jewish organizations, both leftist and rightist ones. My friends joined some and I also wanted to join one. When I mentioned this at home in my father's presence, he said I had to study instead of going into politics. So I never joined Betar [10], or Hashomer Hatzair [11]. My father had nothing against my attending children's centers, etc., as long as they had nothing to do with leftist or rightist Zionist organizations. This was strictly forbidden.
I attended a Maccabi [12] gym going in for gymnastics. I also had two Russian and two English classes per week besides school. I also took music classes twice a week and also, practiced playing at home. I was learning to play the piano. My parents bought a piano. Mama played the piano well, and listened to my playing, when I practiced at home.
Edit Kovacs
My daughter graduated from an economic
high school and worked first in a ministry and later in social services.
She has two sons, Tibor and Zoltan. Tibor married a Gypsy girl and became a
peddler. They have one daughter, Anita, who is 10 years old. We do not
really keep in touch with them. Zoltan is now 36 years old and works as a
cook. He married a Bulgarian girl and they have a child, Sandor. They live
with me in my flat. I am painfully conscious of the fact that everybody in
my family married Gentiles, and I feel as if I were the only Jew left in
the family.
But I believe that it does not matter whether somebody is Jewish or
Christian, all that matters is that they should be good and kind-hearted.
high school and worked first in a ministry and later in social services.
She has two sons, Tibor and Zoltan. Tibor married a Gypsy girl and became a
peddler. They have one daughter, Anita, who is 10 years old. We do not
really keep in touch with them. Zoltan is now 36 years old and works as a
cook. He married a Bulgarian girl and they have a child, Sandor. They live
with me in my flat. I am painfully conscious of the fact that everybody in
my family married Gentiles, and I feel as if I were the only Jew left in
the family.
But I believe that it does not matter whether somebody is Jewish or
Christian, all that matters is that they should be good and kind-hearted.
After the war, I could not work because of my leg injury. So I first
started working after Jozsef's death. I took up a position as a cashier in
a big state-owned dress making company and I was promoted to the position
of a shop manager after four years.
started working after Jozsef's death. I took up a position as a cashier in
a big state-owned dress making company and I was promoted to the position
of a shop manager after four years.
I married again in 1948. My second husband, Jozsef Schwarz, was born in
1911 in Nadar, Szatmar county (now in Romania). I know nothing about his
family and very little about his life before and during the war. I know
that he was in a forced labor battalion during the war in Poland. He was
not religious at all, but I think that he came from quite a religious
family, because when I asked him to come with me to synagogue on the high
holidays, he would always say: "I would do anything, absolutely anything
for you, but I am not going to the shul (synogogue) because I have been
through such horrible things that I have already expiated all the wrongs I
have done." He died four years after we got married in 1952, and I felt
that such a man should be buried in a kitl as any good observant Jew. I got
married a third time in 1984-I was not so young then-but he died three
years later. He was not Jewish.
1911 in Nadar, Szatmar county (now in Romania). I know nothing about his
family and very little about his life before and during the war. I know
that he was in a forced labor battalion during the war in Poland. He was
not religious at all, but I think that he came from quite a religious
family, because when I asked him to come with me to synagogue on the high
holidays, he would always say: "I would do anything, absolutely anything
for you, but I am not going to the shul (synogogue) because I have been
through such horrible things that I have already expiated all the wrongs I
have done." He died four years after we got married in 1952, and I felt
that such a man should be buried in a kitl as any good observant Jew. I got
married a third time in 1984-I was not so young then-but he died three
years later. He was not Jewish.
After the war, we got back our flat, where we all lived together until my
sister Gizella left for Canada with her son Gyuri and her daughter Erzsi,
who was born in 1950. I bought a one-room flat in the same house where my
parents lived. We have kept up a very close connection with Gizella and I
visited them more than a dozen times. And my nephew Gyuri calls me once
every three weeks even today.
sister Gizella left for Canada with her son Gyuri and her daughter Erzsi,
who was born in 1950. I bought a one-room flat in the same house where my
parents lived. We have kept up a very close connection with Gizella and I
visited them more than a dozen times. And my nephew Gyuri calls me once
every three weeks even today.
During the war, in June 1944, my daughter and I, my mother and my sister,
and my sister's little son, who was the same age as Maria, were together in
a yellow-star house in Nepszinhaz Street. We were crammed into a three-room
flat with a dozen other people. The men were in forced labor battalions. In
July, the women and children were taken to a stadium from where we would
have been deported. A decent Arrow Cross (Hungarian Fascist) man-because
there existed such people as well-told me that everybody with a child under
the age of two should try to sneak away, while they would be looking the
other way. My family and I went back to the yellow-star house and we were
left in peace until the German occupation on October 15, 1944.
A week after that, the Arrow Cross people came again and collected all the
younger women and set them off on foot on a death march towards the
Austrian border. My sister and I managed to escape and arrived back in
Budapest in early November. In the meantime, my mother had been taken to
the ghetto together with the children, but we managed to find them when we
got back. My father also managed to escape from the Austrian border and he
found us in the ghetto. We pulled through the ghetto times somehow. On the
day before Liberation, in February 1945, I went out of the cellar where we
had been hiding during the bombing to get some food. I was injured by
shrapnel and I was left lying on the street for some days and got blood
poisoning, so my right leg had to be amputated below the knee (the
operation was done in the Jewish Hospital). This marked me for the rest of
my life.
and my sister's little son, who was the same age as Maria, were together in
a yellow-star house in Nepszinhaz Street. We were crammed into a three-room
flat with a dozen other people. The men were in forced labor battalions. In
July, the women and children were taken to a stadium from where we would
have been deported. A decent Arrow Cross (Hungarian Fascist) man-because
there existed such people as well-told me that everybody with a child under
the age of two should try to sneak away, while they would be looking the
other way. My family and I went back to the yellow-star house and we were
left in peace until the German occupation on October 15, 1944.
A week after that, the Arrow Cross people came again and collected all the
younger women and set them off on foot on a death march towards the
Austrian border. My sister and I managed to escape and arrived back in
Budapest in early November. In the meantime, my mother had been taken to
the ghetto together with the children, but we managed to find them when we
got back. My father also managed to escape from the Austrian border and he
found us in the ghetto. We pulled through the ghetto times somehow. On the
day before Liberation, in February 1945, I went out of the cellar where we
had been hiding during the bombing to get some food. I was injured by
shrapnel and I was left lying on the street for some days and got blood
poisoning, so my right leg had to be amputated below the knee (the
operation was done in the Jewish Hospital). This marked me for the rest of
my life.
Vilmos and I had one daughter, Maria. She was born in August 1942. My
husband had already been drafted into forced labor in June 1942, but he was
allowed to come home to see his newborn baby. He saw her only a few more
times before he was killed in 1945. He was beaten to death in a camp in
Balf, near Lake Ferto, in early 1945, because he stole one small potato.
husband had already been drafted into forced labor in June 1942, but he was
allowed to come home to see his newborn baby. He saw her only a few more
times before he was killed in 1945. He was beaten to death in a camp in
Balf, near Lake Ferto, in early 1945, because he stole one small potato.